Sunday, May 31, 2009

Sugar... the fantasy

Don't be fooled. Yeah, her lips are great and all, but sugar is shitty enough for everyone, let alone fibromyalgia sufferers. More than I care to say, sugar is my kryptonite. If you can't exercise, at least avoid sugar any way you can.
The truth is, I usually feel like ass when I eat sugar. When it's going down, I'm like, woohoo! I'm the king of the fucking world! Then I get a weird feeling like when I go to the doctor and he tells me "Uh, I'm gonna have to check your prostate." Then I notice he's got fingers like Andre the giant and a series of Superbowl rings on each finger -- even his thumb. So, if you have fibromyalgia or chronic fatigue sugar is the worst. You're gonna notice your symptoms are out of control and your energy level will drop quicker than Paris Hilton's undies. Look up fibromyalgia and sugar on the Google -- I'm not your damn mom, you look for it.

What you'll find is that there are times when fibro sufferers crave sugar in ways that seem manic. I've had moments that have really scared the sauce out of me. I'll be fine, eating real healthy, then eat sweets like a crack-whore diabetic, and I'm not that into sugar as a rule.

See the kid in this picture? Sure, she's all content now, but I have it on good authority that after her little lollipop session there, she shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Am I crazy?

It's a work in progress.
Exercise is a huge part of coping with fibromyalgia. I've been told by more than one doctor that it's the best thing for the condition. At the same time it should be approached with some caution. Sure, you have to do the smart thing, like check with your doctor before starting any exercise program, especially if you're older, overweight and have a family history of god-knows-what. It's also understood that fibro carries some difficulties with it regarding exercise. Symptoms can be exacerbated by physical activity -- chronic pain that becomes real bad chronic pain can be an efficient buzz kill. So, how do you cope with such a lovely catch-22? How do you know if you can pull off mild exercise, much less a hardcore workout program like P90X or anything that involves moving your ass from point A to B? I'll be honest, I spoke with my doctor and she wasn't too concerned with my ability to pull this off. Why? Perhaps I gave her the impression that I wanted to do this, no matter what. Granted, if I had high blood pressure, or was under the threat of serious injury, she would have reeled me back to a respectable level. She did say to be careful and use some common sense. Which, in it's simplicity is more profound advice that most of us usually acknowledge. Truth be told, I was more scared about how painful this was going to be, even more than the actual exercise itself.
There are some realizations that can help. First, just do anything to get moving. It doesn't matter that you'll have setbacks, and I can assure you, you will. There will be some mornings that you'll try to roll out of bed and the pain will smack you down faster than a nun's yardstick. Don't let it unravel you, just spend the day resting through it and plan the next workout. Tailor your exercise to what you can do and when you do it, push yourself a little. Don't get discouraged and start throwing in the towel because you miss a day or two. Besides, it could be much worse, you could still be in junior high school.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

I'm back!

I worked out last night -- not much pain at all and the sinus thing seems to be on its way out. It felt good to be able to do 15 push ups without any difficulty. Apparently, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. However, it can render you impotent, incontinent and more disillusioned than a virgin on prom night. Of course, that's just my opinion.

Monday, May 25, 2009

On the ropes

I've currently gone 3 days without doing P90X. I've been sore -- I'd say mostly from the fibro and a sinus infection. Shit. I've been avoiding septoplasty for about 2 years now. I was told the sinus and ear infection roller coaster would just get worse until I had this procedure done. If I may whine... the inner ear gets full of fluid and I walk around loopier than Dick Cheney on a rifle range. It makes exercise really impossible -- especially leaning forward. Anyone with sinus issues will tell you that leaning over during an infection is the equivalent of jamming a fondue fork into your eye socket. I may cave and let them bust my nose and reshape it in Rula Lenska's image. I will pick up where I left off with the exercise -- I have to keep going in spite of myself. I'm going to do the work out tonight if it kills me -- so to you Tony Horton,
I say,
suck it, bitch.

Burning man

Not that one, you pinko hippies -- the one where your skin burns from the hyper sensitivity of fibromyalgia. Last night I woke up in the middle of the evening a man on fire. This part really blows, when you wake up about every two hours with your limbs aching. If you suffer from this particular symptom I recommend a loose-fitting cotton shirt -- long sleeve. Take Ultram, if you have it -- it tends to work better than anything else my doctor has given me. Maybe take a warm bath with epsom salt too -- however, I'd suggest taking the medication after the bath. If it's 3 in the morning and you're drugged and floating in a hot bath, well, you're just asking for trouble, aren't ya? So, think it through before you find yourself floating tits-up and hurling toward a bright light.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Day 5: I can't move...

OK. This isn't me -- but I feel like this poor bastard
Who the hell knew that yoga would kick my ass six ways from Sunday? I was so sore from p90X's yoga workout that I still have limited control over my bladder. However, in its defense I've never done yoga -- not really. I'm working muscles in places not even my creator knows about. The front of my hip region and stomach area -- damn. So, I took a day off yesterday in order to recover and I feel much better today. I'm ready to do the legs and back workout tonight and will keep the ball rolling, no matter what. I do feel better overall and have noticed improvement in my flexibility and aside from the workout, the fibro pain in the morning seems to be improving. I have a fantasy about being able to do all of these workouts with the same ease (or ability) as Tony Horton and his ultra-fit spawns of evil. After the pain I experienced with the yoga, it's become personal.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Day 4 -- I'm still kicking

What the hell? I have no idea what these two gentlemen are really doing, but I hope at least one of them gets dinner and a few minutes of spooning afterward.

So. DAY 4 : I did the yoga and although I didn't finish, I really gave it a hell of a go. I'm still in quite a bit of pain. There's a strange issue with fibromyalsia which I experience often. It's a sensitivity to touch, which usually feels like burning in my extremities -- mostly my forearms and back. That, in addition to morning stiffness (not the good kind) but acute pain, particularly in the early hours of the day really screws things up. I must say, the yoga was really invigorating, in spite of the pain. I've been told more than a few times that yoga is particularly good for fibro.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Day 1... Kill Me Now

A little background. I'm a 47-year-old male, with a family history of heart disease and diabetes. I've suffered with fibromyalgia for a few years now, and anyone who has this disorder knows what it's like -- you go to the doctor looking for answers and instead, you get medication. You've gone through all the tests -- arthritis? no wait... thyroid disease ... hold it, you're having an allergic reaction to something ... oh, I got it, Lyme disease! Sometimes it seems like it's never going to end. Fortunately, my doctor is a good one. She never stopped trying to get to the bottom of my symptoms. Finally, fibromyalgia. I'm not one who sat around wondering what was going on with my body either. I kept researching and following up with the symptoms and they kept leading back to fibro. I had a pressure-point test and almost went through the roof (with pain) when my doctor pressed on these spots. So.. there it was, finally, a diagnosis. What do I do now? Well, I kept studying about the disease and went to a class my insurance offered to help me better understand what I was dealing with.
Yes -- there are drugs out there and sometimes they help. Other times I get plain sick of the pain killers and anti-inflammatory stuff I put down my gullet. I've tried everything from Advil to Indica, and although I'm a passive exerciser, I've come to realize that you really have to kick this situation in the ass. I've been told more than once since this diagnosis that exercise will improve your fibro symptoms exponentially. So, I've started P90X and I'm currently on day 3 of a pursuit that has been both energizing and painful. Day 1, which was working chest and back, left me in quite a bit of pain the following day. I was too sore to even do the "Ab-Ripper", and although I felt like a bit of a wimp, I figured I'd let nothing discourage me. I flailed like a monkey on fire when doing the plyometrics on day 2, but did arms, shoulders and the ab ripper for day 3. ab ripper is the dance of the dark lord. I know I'm gonna hurt like hell tomorrow, but I'm gonna see this through if it kills me. I'll post day 1 photos soon to show my progress -- I think the humiliation of such photos will keep me going. I think that one day (hopefully soon) I'll be Tony Horton's disciple, but for now, I think he's Satan.